Category Archives: addiction

Top Post of 2010: Benefits of Not Drinking Alcohol – or Drinking Less

Posted on by
1

So, statistically speaking, the post I wrote about my own struggles with social drinking topped the post I did in 2008 on Miley Cyrus’s photos in Vanity Fair. This tells me that a lot of people, who don’t necessarily have full-fledged problems with alcohol addiction, want to drink less.

If this is you, thanks for clicking and for reading. Truthfully, the sheer number of people coming to my blog to read about this topic has given me a brand new resolve to stick to my guns about doing far less casual, social drinking. And this is difficult to do when you live in California a few miles away from Wine Country. People in the San Francisco Bay Area really, really, really like their wine. Every dinner party comes equipped with at least two bottles of vino (and this is for a small group of four people).

For about three months in 2010, I went cold-turkey. That meant no alcoholic beverages whatsoever. I said no to the proffered glass of wine or beer, and avoided going out to big social events at bars. For those three months, I slept better, I felt less tired, and I was more productive. No, really, I was (although you couldn’t necessarily see that from looking at the number of blog posts here, with last New Year’s entry still visible on my home page).

Now, however, I have a glass of red wine, champagne or a beer about two or three times a week, and I limit myself to one. Arthritis runs in my family, and part of the reason I decided to relent – in addition to the fact that I actually like to have a glass of wine or beer or champagne from time to time – is that studies have shown a glass a day actually might help prevent the ravages of time on my hands and neck.

Honestly, the original reason I renegotiated my relationship with social drinking was that my father was a (mostly) functioning alcoholic. I worried about genetic predispositions and had negative associations with people getting drunk. Graduate school is fairly stressful, and when I noticed myself have two glasses of wine a night to unwind, I took action.

To be fair, I don’t think it’s a matter of how many times per week you drink (unless you feel you  HAVE to have that drink at the end of the day to “relax” – and then it may be), but how much. When I was younger, and still in college, the social norm was to binge drink. My alma mater, the University of New Hampshire, was recently voted the “Druggiest College in America,” so maybe my particular peer group was excessively into keg parties and not the “norm.” Point being, I learned to drink from two very bad sources: my dad (who kept Maker’s Mark in business) and fraternity brothers (even if you haven’t attended a party and witnessed the nonsensical amount of drinking, you’ve at least seen a movie depiction or two).

Thankfully, growing up and being an adult means learning to rethink your old habits, and I’ve never been tempted to follow in my father’s soused and soggy footsteps. On January 2, however, when much of the so-called First World is recovering from one of the booziest nights of the year, it’s important for us to rethink our individual, social, and cultural relationships to alcohol. Let’s just say that I drink far less than I used to and I enjoy my outings far more. But I’m no teetotaler.

Everything, as they say, in moderation.

Here’s to a happier and healthier you in 2011!

Alcohol is not my friend.

Posted on by
7

During the past few months, I’ve been furiously writing and trying to get all the requirements for my PhD out of the way. In that time, I’ve probably imbibed about 10 gallons of wine – most of which was consumed a glass or two at a time. Lately, though, alcohol and I have been not getting along. Our friendship, I think, has just about run its natural course.

I first had a beer at age 18, at a keg party, and I hated the taste of it. In fact, I tried different kinds of alcoholic beverages and hated every single one of them. Like coffee, I think that it’s an acquired taste. The tastes of adulthood – or at least that was how I conceptualized it back then. At 18, it seemed important to ‘act’ like an ‘adult’ – whatever that meant. Now, I still feel like I’m acting like an adult most of the time, but I realize that a good performance has nothing to do with beverages. 

I think that, deep down, you probably know you have a small problem if you have a drink or two every night “to relax”. Moderate drinking is medically defined as one serving of alcohol per night for men. Any more than that and you would be a ‘heavy drinker’. Yikes. Light drinkers have one to two servings per week, just for comparison’s sake.

Last night was a friend’s birthday party. There was wine everywhere, and I knew that I probably shouldn’t drink anything, but when she offered, I immediately caved in to peer pressure. Apparently, peer pressure extends well beyond the cut-off of high school. I drank one glass, then poured myself another small glass. By the end, I think I had about four or five glasses of wine. 

I went home, managed to write from midnight until 2am, and then had a shitty night’s sleep. I always have a shitty night’s sleep when I drink more than a glass of anything alcoholic. And as I tossed and turned, at some point in the middle of the night, I thought to myself: “I’m an asshole.” I simply cannot drink anymore. My body does not like it, and I do not like it when my body revolts.

My dad was a functioning alcoholic. Kept a steady job, got promotions, paid his bills. But, also, drank every night (2, 3 or more whiskey on the rocks). And, occasionally (it was more than I would like to admit, anyway), kept me up until 3, 4, or 5am drinking and telling me stories. Or yelling. There was always a fair share of yelling.

My mom never drank. When she did, I hated it. She would only have a glass or two on holidays, but it always went straight to her head. She was a giggler, and it weirded me out. It just didn’t seem like my mom anymore, you know?

So, I have no idea why I ever thought it was a good idea to drink. Ever. 

Here are some statistics from Gallup to sober you up:

1. “The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention defines “excessive drinking” as an average of more than one drink per day for women, and an average of more than two drinks per day for men.” (at this rate, I am excessive)

2. “Nearly a third (32%) of Americans say that drinking has been a cause of trouble in their families. Interestingly, women (who are less likely than men to drink and to report drinking too much) are slightly more likely than men to report that drinking has been a problem in their families (35% compared with 29%).”

3. “There were nearly 20,000 alcohol-induced deaths in 2001, the last year for which data are available from the National Center for Health Statistics. And these numbers do not include deaths resulting from unintentional injuries or homicides, many of which may indirectly be related to alcohol use.”

4. “The 2006 poll showed 71% of American drinkers said they had an alcoholic drink in the last week, which is significantly higher than the 54% who said the same in 1996.”

5. “Also on the rise is the number of drinks Americans are drinking. The poll shows those who drink alcohol report drinking an average of 4.5 drinks per week, compared with 2.8 in 1996. “

Are we stressed out? Working too much? 

I’d love to see the numbers now, in the midst of the worst economic crisis to hit the U.S. in decades. I’m betting that the numbers for alcohol consumption are up (and, now that I think of it, I’m betting that gambling rates are up, too).

I’m cutting myself off. From now on, I’m going to try to be one of the 37% of Americans who completely abstain from drinking. I’m tired of being in the other camp.

Not drinking alcohol, and what I’ve discovered.

Posted on by
187

1. I’ve discovered that I want a drink. Badly. Especially when I’m having a horrible day. I never thought of myself as one to self-medicate, but there it is. This begins to make me realize that a month off from all booze is maybe a good thing.

2. I’ve learned that almost EVERY social engagement has something to do with alcohol. From bowling to dinner, people push drinks on you. Not intentionally. They just offer. And wonder why you’re not having any.

3. Thus, I’ve realized just how hard it must be for an alcoholic to have friends who still drink. It feels shitty to be around slightly drunk people and be the only one sober. Refer back to #1.

4. Some people are cool with it – the experiment of not drinking. Some people aren’t. They get defensive. Like I’m judging them for still drinking. It gets worse when I say that I “might” have a problem with alcohol.

5. At first, I didn’t like going to social events anymore. Because I was scared that I wouldn’t be funny or social without a glass of wine to relax me. Alcohol is a social lubricant, right?

6. I discovered that after awhile, it’s normal not to drink anymore. I’m on week 4, and it’s turning into a normal night for me to just have a glass of water with dinner.

7. I’m losing a ton of weight by doing nothing other than avoiding my usual one or two drinks every other night. Seriously. It’s like magic.

8. I’ve also discovered that I look better and I feel better. My body, especially as it gets older, just can’t handle the booze anymore. Even a glass later, and my head starts to buzz. I think that my liver is older, too, because it felt like longer to process the alcohol in my system. I felt, in essence, drunk faster and longer. Now, I don’t get as many headaches or upset stomachs. Coincidence? Maybe. But see below.

9. I sleep better. Drinking at night was making me restless. I know it’s a depressant, but a glass or two at night was making it more difficult for me to get a solid night of actual rest. Now I wake up feeling like I actually slept.

10. I’m less depressed. And dark. And moody. Which, although it makes me funnier, is better off dead. (Remember that movie with John Cusack, and the kid on the bike? And the French chick? It’s still great, by the way.)